Puzzle

Probably many a times telling something straight on face might have a momentary impact but probably making it feel what has to be told would leave an ever lasting scare...
I sat alone the breeze was strong... it rained very heavily.. my friends kept buzzing me on my mobile but i was lost... did not understand what i was trying to understand sitting here... i didn't understand anything other than the physical presence of the body... was feeling cold.. felt very lonely... but my mind kept telling me how can you be so lonely with so many wonderful friends along side you.. and you look so happy in your day to day life... yes i am like that full of happiness all around me... but then felt like am I trying to run away from myself? Everything looked like a puzzle where in i was not able to understand the problem itself :-(
Felt like i was a very happy man... but it took some time to understand that happiness was in the form of sand in my hand... never understood when it slipped... i always wonder why is that i can never visualize what is next, is it that the entire world leaves in sort of a lost world?
Its raining very heavily... i am drenched in rain and feeling really cold and my body is shivering ... felt just need some help...
well probably few thought i never understood the actions and i was dumb... but i felt there was a feeling which i kept to myself hoping not to hurt others... saw a beautiful end but yet another beginning....
I walked alone, one hand did stop me... i felt it was with me... but everything looked soo virtual.. yet soo real..